‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all was quiet ‘til spring
No engines were running, no joy could they bring.
The bikes all stood sleeping, wrapped up in their sheds
Batteries were charging, you could tell by the LEDs
All bikers were snuggled up warm in their beds
Dreams of circuits and twisties flashed through their heads
And I in my Christmas hat, happy and warm
Snored and farted my way to the dawn.
Then out in the garden all hell was let loose
The alarms were blaring they could wake a dead goose
I ran to the window, what was the matter?
A joy riding idiot, I’d make his head splatter
The light of the moon on the new fallen snow
Cast just enough light on the scene down below
A fat red clad ass was stuck in the shed door
And around the shed eight reindeer did paw.
Down to the garden I went pretty quick
But I wasn’t stupid , I carried a big stick
I grabbed hold of the trousers and gave such a pull
Luckily they were strong, made of quality wool
A jolly fat man, beard and red cheeks
I recognized that face, I’d seen it for weeks
“Santa” I said “why are you in my shed?”
“Shouldn’t you be giving presents to children in bed?”
The fat man laughed and rubbed his round tum
“I’m sorry young Ratso, I justed wanted some fun
I’ve been working so hard, all the time stuck inside
Even though it is Christmas I just wanted a ride”
“No problem Santa, I’d love a ride to
Work some Christmas magic, so the tires stick like glue,
You take the Triumph, I’ll take the Zed
Careful though, it’s not like your sled”
On snow covered streets the two did go
Kept toasty warm by a magical glow
Posing in shop windows, beaming with pride
Knee down on corners, Santa could ride!
Their circuit finished, to the sleigh they returned
The bikes were stowed away as if no wheel had turned
Onto his sleigh Santa did climb
Off in a hurry to make up lost time
Christmas morning dawned and for Ratso a prize
Down in his shed a glorious surprise
Carbon Fiber and Titanium, how it did glow
Bits to go faster, not just for show.
“God rides a Harley”, or so it is said
But Santa has dreams of Triumphs in his head
And on frozen wind a greeting did come
“Happy Christmas to all, start to dream of the sun”
Happy Christmas everyone,